How does the US and Spain Compare? Before I went to Madrid, my thoughts on Spain were very stereotypical and included dark men with slicked-back hair, firey tempers and machismo attitudes. After four weeks among Madrileños, my mind is completely changed. I now see Spain as a country that on one hand has a heavy cultural heritage from a recently complicated political history as well as from the strong presence of the Catholic Church, but on the other hand as a country that is working very actively to make significant societal changes, especially when it comes to issues relating to gender equity. Take the Law of Equality for instance, or the new federally paid paternity leave (which may be short, but at least it’s a step in the right direction).
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Granted, Madrid is not Spain. Madrid is the country’s capital and thus by definition it is more international, and often more progressive, than other areas. But the Lattice Group’s target group is the college-educated young people who live primarily in urban areas. Comparing this same segment of society between several nations generates a sense of the differences in attitudes between countries among this particular demographic. Here are some highlights of how what I learned in Spain contrasts with what I learned in the USA: 
- Several of the students and young professionals that we interviewed in Spain, male as well as female, felt unsure about whether or not they would ever marry. Meanwhile, in the United States, we only received one answer (out of over 30 interviews) that marriage (or long-term partnership) was not a definite plan for the future—everyone counted on getting hitched! In Spain, not a single person answered that they wanted to marry before thirty, thirty-five being the preferred age overall. In the United States, the ideal age varied more, but the majority fell somewhere around 27-28. According to our interviews (which I do not in any way claim to be generally applicable), Americans see walking down the isle as a given, and they’re eager to do it earlier, while Spaniards increasingly see marriage only as an option, and one that may no longer be attractive, or necessary in order to lead a fulfilling life.
This leads me to ask:
a.) Is there persistent pressure in the US to be married in order to be a “fully matured” member of society? b.) If no one is getting married in Spain, what will happen to La Familia? - In Spain, not a single young man out of the ones we interviewed expressed the desire for a stay-at-home wife. These responses came from a wide variety of interviewees, many of whom had grown up with a mother at home. In fact, even the most politically conservative of our interview subjects, including a young entrepreneur as well as a right-wing politician, said that though they found the idea of a parental presence in the home appealing, they were not in favor of their future wife staying at home full-time as they feared it would lead to a feeling of being un-fulfilled on the part of the woman, which in turn would affect the family negatively. In the United States, the vast majority of the young men we interviewed expressed positive views on stay-at-home mothers, and many even responded that they hoped their future wife would stay at home. In a country where work is valued about all else (USA), it is surprising that many still believe that one person staying home (as domestic labor is still not commonly considered “work”) is the ideal. At the same time, in a country that traditionally values family so highly (Spain), it is surprising that the stay-at-home scenario is dwindling both as an ideal, and as an option.
This leads me to ask:
a.) Are stay-at-home mothers (amas de casa) becoming rarer among younger Spanish generations for purely equal-opportunity reasons, or are the financial demands that increasingly require dual-income households the actual reason behind the shift in mentality?
b.) If the traditional model of the male bread-winner and the female help-mate is still the form toward which the middle class strives in the United States, does that mean that this model is still more financially viable in the US? How, and why? - The American favor towards stay-at-home parents may find its root in the fact that the overwhelming majority of the Americans we interviewed also expressed disdain for any kind of childcare centers. The overall view among the young Americans we interviewed was that the ideal child-care arrangement for young children is having a parent at home. Many (ok, honestly, most) cringed at the mention of childcare centers. Even the ones who responded that they believed in universal early public childcare as a principle in order to “level the playing field” for less privileged families who can’t afford to put their children in private care, answered that they would not consider using it for their own children. The Spaniards, on the other hand, responded that the ideal child-care arrangement in their minds included time split between a “guarderia” (childcare center) and the parents. Many noted that they believed the time spent in childcare centers is critical for the social development of a child. This difference in attitude may be explained by the fact that Spain, and Europe in general, offers heavily subsidized or free early public childcare, and that this provision is used by all segments of society. Those young Spaniards we interviewed from upper-middle class backgrounds had commonly spent some time in childcare centers, while Americans from the same socio-economic background rarely had.
This leads me to ask:
a.) Are the European childcare centers of higher quality than those in the USA because they are used by more privileged people who are able to push up the standards? Or is it not fundamentally a question of quality, but purely one of stigma? What implications does a negative stigma on childcare centers have when it comes to work-life balance for the parents?
To conclude, Spaniards are the most social people I have ever met. And they need the least sleep. Their workday is long and they hardly ever seem to make it home before 8 (unless they are civil servants, “funcionarios”). Dinner is usually around 9 or 10 and weekday bedtime close to 1 or 2. When asked, Spaniards reply that the ideal amount of sleep per night in order to be healthy is 6 hours. I’ve always been told it’s 8 (I sure know I can’t function on less than that!). Ergo, no matter how much the Spaniards we interviewed insist that they work a ridiculous amount, and that self-fulfillment through work seems increasingly important, they are far from letting their beloved social time go. And I’m sure they never will. They seem to have approached the issue of finding time for everything in a day by simply cutting out sleep. - Astri
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